Miles' Make-A-Wish Trip
Although our Make-a-Wish trip with the Dallas Cowboys took place nearly three months ago, I find an intense need to document the memories of it on this blog before I forget too many of the details. It was truly one of the greatest few days we have had collectively as a family and we are eternally grateful to the staff and volunteers at Make-A-Wish Central & South Texas, Make-A-Wish North Texas, and all of the amazing players, coaches and employees working with the Dallas Cowboys organization.
Last Summer during a particularly challenging visit to the Dell Comprehensive Care Clinic (a wonderful and unique clinic model here in Austin that only serves medically complex kids like Miles), one of the in-house social workers came in to discuss any possible programs we might qualify for to help with Miles’ care, provide some respite, etc. Texas is not known as being a state that is particularly helpful to families who have kids with special needs and the various interest lists that are available are tens of thousands of names long. It takes 5-10 years of waiting before your name reaches the top. We had Miles on all of these lists when he was a toddler and lost our place in line during the five years we relocated to California. I signed him back up for all of them within weeks of moving back here in 2013, but we still have a ways to go. I was feeling discouraged and tired—feelings that are always magnified during the summer months when school is out. After exhausting the list of things we don’t qualify for, the social worker asked if I’d considered applying for a wish for Miles. To my surprise I just started bawling like a baby right then and there in front of her. I deeply understand the severity of my son’s conditions, but it was still very hard to hear another person acknowledge that he is the type of child who can qualify for a gift from Make-A-Wish. I wiped my eyes, got myself together, and decided it couldn’t hurt to just apply, and so I began the easy process of doing so when I got home.
Miles has very limited interests and is non-verbal, so it feels strange to write down your child’s wish without really knowing if it is something he would choose for himself. (Oh, how I wish I could know his innermost wishes and dreams!) My younger son and I brainstormed for a bit and came up with a very short list of ideas. We ultimately decided that Miles and our entire family would love the chance to meet our beloved Dallas Cowboys and attend a game. My husband and I joined in marriage as two devout and life-long Cowboys fans and our boys have inherited that same love for America’s favorite football team. Miles has always shown an interest in watching Cowboys games with us on Sundays and has a bedroom decked out in Cowboys colors and décor. He used to light up when Miles Austin would come on the field, as we made a big deal out of them having the same name. Despite his obvious interest in the team, we very rarely take Miles to places beyond school and home as the worry that he will have a behavioral episode in public is quite great. So, why in the world did we think a crazy loud Cowboys game would work? I can’t tell you that I was 100% sure this was a good move, but something inside me told me that this was the right choice for all of us. And thank the stars, in the end…it was!
It started out terribly rocky, however, and cast that familiar ‘why did we try this’ feeling in my gut pretty much as soon as we checked into our hotel at the Galleria in Dallas. We thought we could put Miles in his special needs stroller and take him into the mall to buy us all Cowboys jerseys to wear to the game. But our boy was quite content in the fluffy hotel bed he’d settled himself into, and spiraled quickly into a terrible episode of aggression and self injury that left my husband with a ripped sweatshirt and bloodied hands, me with what I thought for a few minutes was a broken nose (thankfully it wasn’t), and Miles in a two-minute long nasty seizure. It was a discouraging way to start things off for sure, but once he came out of the postictal haze of the seizure we carried on with our plan and loaded up with our gear.
The next morning was the first actual day of activities for us and Jerry Jones had sent his team bus and driver to pick us up. It was at this point that we realized there would be another family joining us for their son’s wish, and admittedly, we became even more worried about Miles’ ability to tolerate these outings as we didn’t want to take away from this other sweet kid’s experience. As we were about to board, Miles was clearly unsure of what was happening and again he spiraled into a fight or flight, blind rage and attacked my husband in front of the hotel for what felt like hours. We made the decision that my husband would drive Miles in our personal vehicle so that Brooks and I could still have the experience of riding on the bus to The Star practice facility in Frisco. I spoke to my weary husband on the way and learned that Miles had done what I wish I could say rarely happened while in our car—-he banged his head so viciously over and over against his head rest until he was completely worn out. Strike two against our confidence of us being able to successfully attend any of the events planned for us over the next three days.
When we arrived at The Star Miles was calm and a little out of it. But we loaded him up in his stroller anyway, attempted to plaster smiles on our stressed out faces, and walked into the warmest, most incredible greeting by the entire corporate staff we could have imagined. They cheered us in as though it was our own private pep rally. Bless those sweet people for putting on genuine smiles to make us feel welcome.
From there we were brought into a board room where Miles was given his very own jersey and his brother acted as his agent and signed on his behalf a contract making him an honorary Dallas Cowboy for a day. What a thoughtful gesture!
Despite us building this trip up with pep talks and social stories, it wasn’t until we were surrounded by Dallas Cowboys logos that Miles truly seemed to grasp where we were and that it was all in his honor. We saw all of the versions of Cowboys uniforms through the years. We saw Tom Landry’s iconic hat. We got to check out the players’ locker room where Brooks got to size up his foot next to Dak Prescott and Zeke Elliot’s shoes.
We then got to watch the end of a practice and Brooks, Miles and the other young man who was there for his wish got to get up close and personal with the whole team…
And then this happened…
And then Dak Prescott made the wildest dream of one very special 11-year-old brother come true when he not only accepted Brooks’ request for one 10-yarder, but instead played catch with him for about ten minutes. Priceless! Dak, you have no idea how much that meant to Brooks! And Brooks made us proud by catching every single one of those passes without flinching. (he later whispered hilariously to us, ‘oh my gosh, my hands are burning so badly from those passes.’ haha!)
We got the chance to talk to Byron Jones, Zeke Elliot, Dak Prescott and Jason Garrett when they took photos with us and signed some items we brought with us.
We then went to the cafeteria where Jason Garrett asked if he could join us. We were in shock…he had already been so kind to us. He by no means was obligated to sit with us, but did so out of the goodness of his heart. I tell you, that is an A+ human being right there! I am forever grateful for the genuine warmth and generosity he showed to my family.
If the trip had ended after that, we’d have gone away thrilled. The fact that there were two more days of fun to come was mind blowing to us.
On day two we got to have a play day at the stadium.
These pictures and this video will sum up that experience far better than any typed words could ever do…
On our third and final day we were treated to another VIP experience where we got to witness a Cowboys win against the New Orleans Saints. We had limos drive us underneath the stadium where we were dropped off and able to walk straight onto the field for the pre-game warm up. We knew how big of a game this was and had zero expectations of speaking with the players. But despite the weight of the game ahead, Dak, Zeke and Jason Garrett all still amazingly made time for our family. Once again, pictures and videos will show how special it was much better than I could possibly describe it…
One of the only family photos we have with all four of us in it
Miles miraculously made it through THE ENTIRE GAME, and we left with full and happy hearts, marveling over the blessings our family had been granted through the generosity of strangers over the previous three days. Never in our wildest dreams did we imagine we could have had an experience like that together. Never would we have considered asking for it if it weren’t for the social worker suggesting it. If you have a chronically ill child in your family, I strongly urge you to apply for a wish. It really does have a positive effect on every member of the family. (And may result in you writing your own blog post that uses the word ‘amazing’ over and over again!)
Please consider the Make-A-Wish organization for your charitable donations!
